


Say no more

by FuckYeahChilton



Series: How to deal with Sabriel feels [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bonding, Confessions, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sabriel - Freeform, Sam Winchester Gets What Sam Winchester Wants, Sam Winchester finds out what he wants
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-15
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-23 05:34:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14325705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FuckYeahChilton/pseuds/FuckYeahChilton
Summary: ..or in which Gabriel realizes Sam Winchester is better than porn stars.





	Say no more

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a sequel to "Say something" but another little dealing with all my feels after the latest episode, starting pretty much when the episode ended and fuck slow-build, I need Sabriel to be happy ASAP, okay XD

 

 

 

 

*** Say no more ***

 

 

 

 

 

Dean needed a while to calm down, but he calmed down eventually, looking for his brother, who vanished a while ago. Equipped with two bottles of beer, he checked Sam‘s room first, but it was empty. “Sammy?” Dean called, while he kept walking through the bunker and stopped in front of the door of the room they gave to Gabriel. He opened the door and stepped inside, finding his brother on the chair, staring at the empty bed.  
“Hey..” Dean said, but Sam didn’t look up. “Listen, Sammy… What I said before… we.. we gonna find a way, okay? It was stupid to give Gabriel his grace back but it’s not the end of the world.. well.. hopefully..” Dean tried a smile but failed, when Sam turned his head to him, pressing his lips together angrily. “Are you serious, Dean? If you try to apologize, it’s not working!”  
“Wha..” Dean started but paused, looking a bit lost. “Well.. the thing is… you and Cas gave away our chance to open the portal again and now we’re screwed because Gabriel is a dick. It’s no surprise he’s gone the minute he got his strength back.”  
Sam snorted. “What else should we have done? Keeping him here as a prisoner like Asmodeus did? Forcing him into battle to kill his own brother after he was tortured for years? Gabriel is not a tool! Neither is he a weapon we can use whenever we want. He didn’t even have time to heal a bit! We shouldn’t have asked him for help in the first place and now he’s gone and…“ Sam swallowed and looked away because he felt his throat tightening. “Whatever..” he finished the sentence, not able to look at his brother any longer.  
“And what? What, Sam? He’s gone, continuing whatever he did before, living life, enjoying the good things, not giving a damn about us or if everything goes to hell!”  
“You haven’t seen him! After what he’s been through… He needs his family to help him deal with what happened!”  
“Yeah, whatever.. we are not his family.. and he gives a damn about us..”  
“He saved my life. Asmodeus was about to capture him again and kill me and Cas.. just then he got his strength back and saved us. Cas is his brother, Jack his nephew.. if they are family, Gabriel is family as well!” Sam let out a shaky breath and Dean frowned. “You worry about him..”  
“Of course I worry about him, Dean! He’s all alone! I tried praying to him but nothing..”  
“Because he chose, Sam. He chose to be alone. He doesn’t need you to pamper him or whatever you think your part is in this. He’s a coward and a dick. Always has been, always will be. Just like that.”  
“Just like that.” Sam echoed bitterly and stood up. He stomped out of the room and fled into his own, slammed the door shut and locked the door. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and let his fingers run through his hair. “Gabriel...” he whispered and looked up at the ceiling, “I’m praying to you.. I’m begging you.. come back. Not for the fight, not for your grace.. not for us or the world.. Come back to _me_. Please.. I know you trust me.. I know you have faith in me.. And maybe I can do this on my own, but… I.. I don’t want to, okay? I don’t want to be alone.”

Sam waited a few minutes but nothing happened and he started to get angry at himself, because he hated to be whiny.. he hated to beg and he didn’t even know why he needed Gabriel back so badly and not for the greater cause, just for himself. He was mad at Dean, too, because he knew for sure if it had been Cas, he wouldn’t even think twice about giving him his grace back to heal. Sam hated to see Gabriel broken and weak, there was no thinking twice about making his recovery priority. He held no grudge against him for what he did before, because after all.. he helped them.. and he understood his actions probably better than he wanted to admit. He did the same before, turned his back on hunting and tried to live a life, but it never worked out. Sam knew Gabriel’s heart was in the right place and he wanted to help him through the trauma like he wished someone would have helped him through his own.. Gabriel was just a shadow of his usual self when he left and Sam knew he wasn’t okay. 

Sam was tired and exhausted, so he decided to get some sleep; he had way too less anyway the past weeks. He changed his clothes to something more comfortable and settled on the bed, staring at the ceiling. “Douche..” he mumbled, curled up and closed his eyes.  
“Right back atcha, you giant baby moose..” a soft voice said, making Sam almost jump. He stared at the small man, standing in the middle of his room, now well dressed and with no visual trace of torture left. “Gabriel..” he breathed and his voice broke. Seeing him felt like a mountain of weight falling off his shoulders and the relief made him tear up immediately, with no control left over his emotions anymore.  
“No… don’t do this to me..” Gabriel pleaded, “Don’t cry, I’m horrible in dealing with stuff like this..” but it didn’t help and he couldn’t watch Sam like that any longer. He settled on the bed next to him and pulled him into his arms, feeling Sam melt into the embrace and he just held him until he calmed down. “Are you okay?” Gabriel whispered while Sam wiped his face clean. “No..” he shook his head and sniffed. “Are you?”  
Gabriel seemed far away for a while, then his golden eyes found Sam’s. “No.. I guess I am not.. I wanted to go back to my life and just keep going but I realized.. as much as I don’t want to be here.. I couldn’t be there anymore..” he confessed.  
“If you don’t wanna be here.. then you don’t have to..” Sam said quietly. “I know I don’t have to.. But I just can’t get your stupid sad face and your puppy eyes out of my system, so here I am.”  
“I don’t have puppy eyes.” Sam complained and Gabriel smiled. “Oh yes, you have. The worst of all kinds.”  
“Dean will ask you to help us open the portal again.. And he will ask you to fight Michael..” Sam said and the smile on the Archangel’s lips vanished. “And you?”  
“I… uhm.. it would be a great help of course.. but.. I won’t ask you to go through that again. I honestly just want you here..”  
“Why?” Gabriel asked and Sam shrugged. “I don’t know.”  
“I could take you with me. I know you don’t wanna be here, either.”  
A weak smile flashed over Sam’s lips. “You know I can’t do that..”  
“I know… family and shit.. Well, it was worth a try.”  
“Gabriel… why are you really here? Just for my stupid sad face? I don’t buy it.. You’re not that selfless..”  
Knowing Sam was too smart to come up with another story, Gabriel decided to be honest, though it was hard for him to let his guard down and open up. “Maybe…I don’t wanna be alone, either.. And you are my favorite person.. so..”  
Sam’s face lit up and his heart started beating faster. “I am?”  
“Of course you are, dumbass.. It’s not that I don’t care about all of this.. you..family.. I’m just...”  
“You’re afraid.. It’s easier to love nothing than to lose something you love, right?”  
“Yeah… that.” Gabriel agreed and sighed.  
Sam took a deep breath, sorting his thoughts. He knew just because Gabriel came back, doesn’t mean he would stay.  
“I assume it must be hard to choose this, if you have the whole world and everything it offers to pick from, but I’m asking you just this once. Stay here. Choose me.” Sam said and felt his heart pounding so hard in his chest, he was afraid it would just jump out.  
Gabriel looked into Sam’s eyes, trying to find out what that was supposed to mean, not realizing that he slowly moved closer to his face and Sam did the same. Their lips touched carefully, insecure if it was what the other wanted. Sam didn’t know that it was this, what _he_ wanted all the time, until it happened and suddenly everything made sense. “Not for the fight.. or for your grace.. I want.. _you_.” he said softly. “Say no more..” Gabriel replied and their lips melted together for another kiss. They dropped on the bed, wrapped up in each others arms, suddenly not able to stop sharing hungry kisses, until Sam needed to catch a breath. He felt a bit dizzy, but in the best way possible. All his worries were gone for now and his mind was all focused on Gabriel and his hands that were under his T-Shirt now, exploring his body. “Damn, this is better than porn stars..” Gabriel mumbled against Sam’s neck, while placing sweet kisses all over the soft skin. Sam choked a laugh. “This is better than I thought.” he admitted and Gabriel pulled away a little, just to look at him. “You, Sam Winchester, seem to have no idea of my qualities.” he said reproachfully and Sam laughed. “Uhm.. surprise me?” he teased and Gabriel grinned mischievously. “Oh, you will be surprised.”  
Before Sam was able to answer, he felt the Archangel’s soft lips on his again and closed his eyes, still not sure what was happening, but it felt so good. It felt right and he wouldn’t waste time on questioning his feelings in this case. Everyone he ever loved beside his family was dead or gone and he was sure he would never feel this kind of love again in his world, but right now he did and he would do everything, to keep it.  
After a while, Sam’s kisses slowed down, his hands that were wandering over Gabriel’s body over and over now rested, one in his neck, playing gently with his hair, the other in his waist.  
“Samuel..” Gabriel mumbled against Sam’s lips and pulled away a little. Sam opened his eyes lazily and blinked, obviously having struggles to stay awake.  
“Let me get this straight. I haven’t decided yet, but if I help you out in this fight.. I’m not doing it because it’s the right thing.. or because my family needs me.. or the world.. I’m doing it for you. Not because I owe you, but because I want to. Because I choose you.”  
Sam needed a moment to process the words, then he nodded, caressing the Archangel’s cheek with his thumb. “Don’t ever leave me, Gabriel..” he mumbled sleepily and Gabriel smiled. “I remind you to that when you start regretting that you wanted me to stay in the first place.”  
“I won’t..” Sam assured with a tired smile, before he finally dropped off.  
Gabriel breathed a kiss on his forehead, then he snuggled up and smiled. “I guess I need you, too, Sam Winchester..”

 

 

***

 

 


End file.
